Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
