No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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