you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
