bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
