Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
