sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
