i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
