I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I didn't notice because vodka
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
