i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I came so hard my ears popped.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
