I heard we made out
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
