Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
