your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
