Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
