She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
