i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
