I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
