so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
