Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
