Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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