with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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