You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
