i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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