I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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