I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
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