I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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