She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
