doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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