You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I wish life had little blips of pornography
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Randomize
