ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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