What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Quick, to the slutcave!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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