i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
