i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
