i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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