Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I need a burrito and a hug.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize