Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
