ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
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