I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
