Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
