shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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