Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Randomize
