You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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