just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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