it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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