After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
