My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
