Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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