I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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