fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
