Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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