so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
